A giveaway, or what we think we hear


INT: Sandwich shop, present day. A variety of BUSINESS PEOPLE peruse the menu board, listen to their messages on cellular phones, or stare into space. JESSICA, mid-40s, brown hair, skirt and tshirt, waits her turn to order her tuna sandwich. In front of her TWO OVERAGED LOAFER BOYS in chinos and sport shirts and ear-piece phones, talk business while they wait their turn.


Well, you know, all of our clients are circumcised.

(nods head sagely. Appears not to be paying much attention.)
Yeah, I know. Ours, too.

JESSICA appears to be struggling to compose herself. She looks around, but no one else appears to have overheard or is reacting in any way.

(under her breath)
What the fuck? What do these guys sell that they know this?


This is a bad scene, and I would give it a D, probably. The formatting for dialogue in the center of the page doesn’t hold up in the blogosphere, and the writing doesn’t go anywhere. Aristotle and all that, dramatic rise and fall, character interaction – but the upshot is that I spent all damn day wondering what these guys sold and how they would know this about “ALL” their customers.

Until I realized I misheard.

What the guy said was “SPECIAL SIZED.”


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